Do you suffer from perfectionism?
For generations, the Black community has faced immense pressure to be perfect as a means of survival. The need to be the best, the strongest, and the most effective has been ingrained in our DNA.
If we think about slavery, systematic opression and the need for us to survive, CEO Tonya Ladipo says there’s pressure to not show that we’re stressed about it. However, this constant striving for perfection takes a toll on our mental and physical well-being. The Ladipo Group CEO believes this leads to anxiety, depression, and a fixed mindset that leaves no room for growth.
The impact of the perfectionist mindset is significant. It creates inner turmoil, constant self-judgment, and criticism. We become anxious about making mistakes and are unable to turn off our racing thoughts. This mindset not only affects us internally but also spills over into our relationships with others. We become frustrated when others don’t meet our perceived standards of perfection. Ladipo asks, “How can we be excellent, give our best, and do it in a way that has as much softness as possible, that has ease, that is not about striving for perfection?”
Striving for Excellence Instead of Perfection
To break free from the perfectionist mindset, we must shift our focus to striving for excellence with ease. Excellence does not mean being perfect; it means doing our best while embracing our humanity. It means acknowledging that mistakes are a part of the learning process and that growth comes from embracing our imperfections.
Excellence with ease is about finding a balance between delivering high-quality work and taking care of ourselves. It is about being confident in our abilities, having a growth mindset, and being kind to ourselves when we make mistakes. When we adopt an excellence mindset, we experience more calmness, confidence, and joy in our work and our lives.
Cultivating Excellence with Ease
Shifting from perfection to excellence requires effort and intentionality. Here are five strategies to help you cultivate excellence with ease:
Build a Tribe of Excellent Supporters
Surround yourself with people who support your journey towards excellence. Seek out individuals who encourage, uplift, and hold you accountable for making the necessary changes. These supporters will help you stay on track and provide the necessary guidance and motivation.
Practice Positive Self-Talk
When negative thoughts arise, pretend you are your own best friend or someone who adores you. Correct those unkind thoughts with words of encouragement and self-compassion. By practicing positive self-talk, you can reframe your mindset and cultivate a more nurturing and supportive inner dialogue.
Commit to Reflection Time Weekly
Set aside dedicated time each week for reflection. Use this time to record your thoughts, feelings, and learnings. Reflect on your mistakes and how you can grow from them. This practice allows you to pause, gain clarity, and make intentional choices moving forward.
Expand Your Breathing
Incorporate deep breathing exercises into your daily routine. Deep breathing provides a moment of pause, allowing you to center yourself and access your creativity. It oxygenates your brain, enhances your focus, and reduces stress. Take a few moments each day to take deep breaths and reconnect with yourself.
Practice Daily Body Scans
Conduct daily body scans to check in with yourself. Pay attention to any tension or energy in different parts of your body. This practice helps you become more attuned to your physical and emotional needs. By listening to your body, you can make adjustments to bring more ease and balance into your life.
If you want to talk to a mental health professional, contact us at TheLadipoGroup.com/ Therapy.
The Ladipo Group was founded to increase access to Black therapists in Philadelphia and decrease the stigma of mental health treatment. With our Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion consulting, we collaborate with national and international organizations and institutions to create equitable spaces and opportunities for Black, Brown, and African Americans to thrive.